


Operation Retribution

by just_another_lightwood_bane



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Cute Max Lightwood-Bane, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Ducks, Ducks are bloodthirsty beasts, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, I don't like ducks, It's a Herondale thing, Jace Wayland is a Herondale, Lightwood-Banes Being a Family, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, So I'm a Herondale apparently, They always give me the stink eye, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-09 01:59:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20460059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_another_lightwood_bane/pseuds/just_another_lightwood_bane
Summary: What does someone do when their cousin claims that his parents are more in love than theirs? Why yes, they declare war!





	Operation Retribution

“WE DEMAND RETRIBUTION!” came screaming as soon as Alec stepped foot in his home.

“Well hello to you too, Blueberry,” Alec chuckled, untying his boots. He doesn’t go to patrol anymore, now that he has been appointed as the Inquisitor, but the familiarity of the battle-worn pair gives him a sense of calm every time a bigoted Clave official tries to undermine his authority, so standing tall to put them back in their place is a little easier, not that he wouldn’t do it otherwise.

“Dad, we are declaring war, just wanted to let you know” Rafael said matter-of-factly, petting Chairman who was sitting in his lap like a king on a throne, and looked like he was having the time of his life.

Alec walked over to the hot pink sofa where Rafe was sitting, the sofa of course the newest addition to their drawing room, after a passionate argument from his husband.

_“We have children now, Alexander! I refuse to let them live in a home without a splash of colour to brighten their day!”_

As if the three of them needed anything else to brighten their day other than Magnus himself. But of course, Alec couldn’t ever say no to Magnus, especially when he pulled the puppy-eyes on him, so there it was, a hot pink sofa in the middle of their drawing room, surrounded by equally quirky furniture.

“What happened this time? Did someone at the institute say something to you or Max?” Alec was slightly alarmed now. Rafael has always been the more level-headed of the two of his kids, so if he was in on this, this must have been serious.

_Then again, this wouldn’t be the first time someone remarked off-handedly about his kids, and certainly not the first time that specific someone was placed in ichor duty for a month._

“Not at the institute, no, and it wasn’t like that”, Rafe answered hurriedly. “It’s just, tonight we were watching Star Trek with Steph, and he asked us if you and Papa share a toothbrush.”

Alec was thrown off track now. Jace and Clary’s son came round to their home for movie nights, _he really wanted to stake Simon for getting these kids hooked to those shows,_ and play dates, and thousands of other activities that Clary and Magnus insisted on, with Alec and Jace nodding along. _They were both whipped and they knew it, but they both just loved them so much, so sue them._

“Why would he ask that now?” Alec picked both the kids up in his arms. He may have activated the strength rune before coming in to do that, but he just wanted to cherish the years he could do that before they got too big for him to pick up. Chairman meowed loudly to air his annoyance at having his seat removed.

“She said that Uncle Jace and Aunt Clary share a toothbrush, that’s because they are in love. And when I said that you and Papa don’t, she said that Uncle Jace loves Aunt Clary more than you love Papa”, Rafe pouted, plucking at a thread on Alec’s jacket.

“And of course that isn’t true, so we demand justice!” Max replied from his other arm, puffing out his little chest in anger.

“They do _WHAT_?!”

Alec was still processing the news of his Parabatai sharing a toothbrush with Clary.

“They share a toothbrush.” Max supplied breezily.

“Who shares a toothbrush now?” Alec looked away from Max’s face to greet his husband, and then had to remind himself to breathe again when he saw Magnus.

Black leather pants that looks painted on, dark maroon silk shirt that accentuated his toned muscled perfectly, and his favourite jacket, a red one with black embroidery all over it, completed with black eyeliner, glittery maroon eye shadow, and a blazing red streak in his hair, with combats boots with rhinestones on. Even after all these years, he still loses his breath every time Magnus walks into the room.

“Welcome home Darling! I see you’ve already been attacked! You need rescuing or should I come back later?” Magnus smiled and walked up to greet him with a quick peck on his lips, quickly assisted by Max and Rafe covering their eyes and yelling “Stop it!”

“Alright, alright, fine” Magnus laughed, taking Rafe from Alec, “now, who is sharing a toothbrush with whom?”

“Uncle Jace and Aunt Clary, and Steph said that it’s because they love each other and that you and Dad don’t love each other enough for that,” Max was now pouting too.

“Or, we love each other enough not to pass on our germs to each other,” Alec muttered under his breath.

“Well, kids, everyone loves differently. Like how I love your Dad by accepting his _debatable_ wardrobe choices, because it’s his body and his life, and he should be the one to choose what to wear,” Alec just rolled his eyes at that, “and your Dad loves me by accepting the choices I make, no matter how weird it seems to him, because he trusts me.”

“Like the couch?” Max asked.

“Exactly like that!” Alec said.

“But please never share toothbrushes. That is not hygienic, and I will talk to Uncle Jace about that as well.”

“But what about war? Stephen said his parents have more love than you two, and that means war!” Max was excited.

“Obviously that’s not true Blueberry, but I understand the need for it. No one disrespects the Lightwood-Banes!” Magnus decided to indulge in his son’s interest.

_That surely had nothing to do with the fact that he wanted to get back at Blondie for introducing toothbrush sharing to his Biscuit, of course not. _

“Okay, fine, I didn’t want it to come to this, but it has.” Alec sighed in mock-exasperation.

“The Herondales have one weak spot, one thing in this universe that can topple the mighty tower of the house of Herondale” Alec spoke in a conspitorial tone.

“What is it?” both Max and Rafe perked up.

Magnus already knew where this was going, but just watching his kids and his husband together filled him with warmth, so he decided to go along with it.

“Ducks.”

“Ducks?”

Max and Rafe seemed doubtful. How can someone fear such an innocent bird? Especially someone like Uncle Jace, who was the fourth best Shadowhunter they knew, much to his dismay.

_ “Fourth?! I mean I understand that Alec is their dad so they think he’s the best” _

_“Alexander IS the best!”_

_ “You’re biased! But why fourth?” _

_“Of course they think they’re Aunt Izzy and Aunt Clary are better than you.”_

_ “Fair enough.” _

“Don’t doubt guys”, Alec was already planning the prank, “Tomorrow, when they come by to drop Stephen off, we will execute Operation Retribution!”

Magnus just smiled at Alec, noticing the twinkle in the hazel orbs. Alec had never really done the normal kids stuff, where you prank your sibling or friends and have fun with innocent pranks, but Magnus knew that Alec has a prankster side of him that he hardly ever let out, and this occasion might have done just that, and well, Magnus was not going to say no to anything that makes his husband’s eyes sparkle like that.

“Let’s do this!” both Magnus and Alec spun their kids around and chased them, which turned into a tickle fight, and eventually the four of them got exhausted, and started planning the prank tomorrow.

Next morning, both Alec and the kids were getting antsy waiting for the bell to ring, too much excitement for the three of them to handle, which certainly didn’t help with the fact that this had to a covert operation.

So when the doorbell did indeed ring, all three of them startled prompting Max to spill milk in Alec’s lap where he was seated, and Magnus silently snapped his finger to clean up the mess, as well as open the door. He suspected that if any one of them went, they might spill the surprise.

“Good morning Magnus! How are you today?” Clary entered first, with her son’s bag over her shoulder.

“I’m bi and just wanna say hi!” Magnus chirped. It was their ritual, every time Clary wished him good morning, and Magnus just smiled and said something like this, making her smile.

“Hey Magnus, hope you’re ready for another Doctor Who marathon. That’s the verdict for today.” Jace said, carrying his son in his arms.

“I will never forgive Shaquil for introducing these kids to those shows. I mean, a screwdriver, really?”

“It’s a sonic screwdriver! It does everything! Well, except wood. It doesn’t do wood” said the little blond with excited green eyes from Jace’s arms.

“_Stephen Alexander Herondale!_ One day I will introduce you to the better side of TV shows, one that doesn’t include a character sauntering around with a pointy stick!”

At this point both Max and Rafe joined them, excitement bubbling, and gestured Magnus to carry out his part of the plan.

“Steph! Uncle Jace! You’re here!” squealed Max and Jace put his son down and picked up the blue boy, gently booping his nose.

“Hey buddy! Hi Rafe! Ready for a Doctor Who marathon?”

“YES! We’re starting the Eleventh Doctor today!” Max was bouncing with excitement.

“Good for you!” Jace said. _He didn’t understand the shows, but the kids were happy, so what the hell. _

“Uncle Jace, we have a surprise for you” Rafe said, winking at his brother.

“Really buddy? I’d love to see it!” Jace was happy to indulge whatever stroke his godsons' fancies.

“It’s in the balcony, and bring Steph too!”

Jace picked up his son and walked over to the impressive balcony of the Lightwood-Bane residence, Max and Rafe followed them, quickly joined by their parents.

_ One._

_ Two._

_ Three._

“Quack”.

_ “BY THE ANGEL!!!!!!!!!!!”_

_“AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!” _

Both Herondale males could be heard screaming at the same time, making Clary run over worriedly, and making Alec and Magnus topple over with laughter, tears streaming down their faces. Max and Rafe jumped up and down, laughing excitedly.

Jace and Stephen were visibly pale, and scrambled out of the way to hide in the kitchen. Alec simply picked the bird up and put it on the kitchen counter, scaring the two even more.

“This is for saying that your parents have more love than ours!” Max exclaimed.

“And for inflicting poor Biscuit with the same toothbrush you use.” Magnus helpfully supplied.

“_That’s it! All of you are getting acid-washed jeans for Christmas!”_

Magnus’ eyes widened.

Jace smirked.

“And I’m getting an umbrella with spiders on it.”

_“JONATHAN CHRISTOPHER HERONDALE!”_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This is my first fic, so feel free to point out any mistakes, or leave suggestions. Again, happy reading! Find me in tumblr @just-another-lightwood-bane.


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